After sitting in the car for an excessively long period of time and wondering how driving time estimates could be oh so wrong, it is wonderful to be back in Cholula, with my real bed, Internet, tea and freshly cleaned house (a special surprise from my wonderful roomies this weekend). For 3 days, I have been sleeping in a tent/on the beach/in a car on a random road trip that ended up almost everywhere except where we had planned to go (we did make it... eventually!). It was also the first time in Mexico I have rented a car, which was an interesting experience. Of course I have been on a road trip or 2 before (albeit much more carefully organised ones) here in Mexico, but there is that on the edge of your seat nervousness when its someone Else's car and your credit card is sitting in their office waiting for the safe return of the vehicle, completely unscathed. Also, the list of rules is enough to make anyone break out into a nervous sweat... especially when we didn't buy insurance.
Rule #1: Thy shalt not drive off road or on uneven road surfaces
This one is the biggest porqueria of the lot! Although Mexico does boast some nice roads which are up to first world standards (and cost a shit load!), shabby and unkempt roads are to be expected, even on national highways. Not only is it not uncommon to see a few pot holes and crumbly edges, some national highways (main national highways even!) have half the road missing. Yes, sometimes for one reason or another half the road just goes tumbling down the hill, leaving trucks, buses and humble little Renault Clio to queue past one another and teeter precariously past the narrow stretch of road overlooking a 300m sheer cliff. Of course, for every shitty main road, there were also some off roading adventures that were our fault, such as the drive out to the "ideal camping spot" following our rough mud map (that didn't mention the rough 4WD appropriate terrain) and an even muddier road that left our car looking suspiciously dirty. Our small little car (that laboured to speed up to 100km/h) handled the roads like a boss, however unless the rental car people are as stupid as 76% of Mexican motorists, they will surely figure out what has happened but hopefully not be too pissed off.
Rule #2: Thou shalt return the vehicle to the rental office by the specified hour.
It seems pretty simple right? Try to be on time. However, due to an ambitious schedule and an over reliance on Google Maps, it turns out that we have a full extra day to play around with the car. Unfortunately, Google Maps is a load of shit and fails to take into account the amount of topes, retarded people and winding mountain roads en route. It also fails to acknowledge that not all cars (Renault Clio) are able to reach and maintain fast speeds, on which the estimated travel time is based. Bear in mind also, that women are terrible navigators, there is very poor signage on Mexican roads, confusing intersections and that national maps (and lonely planet pictures) are all but useless and you have a navigational disaster. Our 5 hour 6 minute trip back to Puebla ended up lasting near on 10 hours and left us swearing never to trust google maps ever again! Getting lost however, on the first day did turn out to be a blessing in disguise, with a detour to Tajin and the Costa Esmeralda being two of the highlights of our trip.
Rule #3: Thou shalt not break any road rules in the rental vehicle
While they technically exist on the books, in Mexico, road rules serve little more than as a means for corrupt police to earn some extra cash on the side by picking and choosing who is doing the right and wrong thing. Although we were lucky that the police never showed up on our road trip (nor military roadblocks or anything of the like), speeding, running red lights and crazy overtaking were rampant in the hours we spent on the road. Road rules do for the most part, play an important role in regulating society and ensuring that all motorists are safe, however, when for no reason, a sign mandates that the maximum speed limit is 40km/h (on a highway) one has to question the credibility of the clown making such rules. While flagrant disregard for such laws is rampant, such implementations as topes every 20m and the fear of other idiot drivers is enough to keep law and order to some extent. After all, all it takes is a few head bruises before speeding over speed bumps is just not worth it.
Rule #4: Thou shalt not damage the vehicle
And so for 2 days, through rough and nice terrain the car maintained its (relatively) perfect form, all it took was 2 annoying parking 'assistants' (read: the blackmailers who help you park and agree not to touch your car for money), a pissed off driver, a poor reverse park (executed WAYY too quickly and violently) and the scraped side of the car on a barbed wire fence. Nothing boils the blood like 2 annoying twits pestering one for money, so much so that an impassioned park just went wrong and left the car with some scratches that may take some explaining (eyelash batting, crying, lying etc) in order to avoid a hefty charge on that credit card. Of course the rental company won't fix it, just add it to the list and pass the car onto the next sucker. Unless we suck the suckers and get away Scot free, it all depends on negotiation.
Rule #5: Thou shalt not transport explosives, fire crackers or any other illegal items in the rental vehicle
Lol.
Monday, October 17, 2011
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Aches and pains and getting old
As I approach my half birthday, I feel it necessary to acknowledge some recently discovered truths that I cannot avoid as this milestone comes speeding towards me. Now, at risk of offending some of my older readers (hey mum) who on a calender are slightly (some substantially) older but feel like a million bucks and don't wish to hear a 21 and almost a half year old ranting off about old age, unfortunately this crisis is more related to the failing state of my body rather than a paper age and a sense of paranoia. So let me begin by saying:
It seems that after years of moderate - heavy (student/backpacker) paced drinking, the ole cuerpo seems to be having a much harder time in the morning after. Not only that, the entire day after, that night and several days afterwards seem to be very slow moving after a big night out. Not only that, it seems that once I hit a certain alcohol threshold, rather than partying on, doing silly things and talking shit all night, I just go home. Whether that happens at 3am, 1am or even midnight, that young person stamina just isn't there anymore. It is not uncommon for me in my old age now to fall asleep IN THE MIDDLE of a party, be it in a chair, on a couch, on the floor or right next to the speaker, it seems my body has gotten the better of me. For that reason, I decided to test out the ole non drinking routine to see if it might just the the dirty Mexican licor de agave, however, the only difference these days is that I can stay out dancing for longer and I generally manage to WALK home rather than passing out wherever I am. The next day still feels like I have been hit by a truck and the getting out of bed process is still slow, painful and often resigned to a long sleep in at the best of times. But will this stop me partying? Hell no! I am still young enough to want to party! My body just isn't anymore.
But it's not only the partying stamina that has dropped, but the fitness as well. So even in spite of doing yoga a few times a week, it seems all I feel like doing afterwards is eating a big fuck off steak and some chocolate and lying down for a few hours, rather than running a marathon, going for a bike ride or doing anything active. Also, certain poses leave me feeling achy and slow for a day or 2 afterwards, after a STRETCHING WORKOUT!! As for real exercise, well after a bit of rock climbing the other day I was in pain for 2 days afterwards when I tried to lift my arms above my head! And as for climbing a mountain, one leg is STILL hurting 4 days later (how I walk so that only one leg hurts is any one's question). I think that is a pretty big body fitness fail if I ever did see one. But I keep persisting, because many chronologically old people tell me that exercise is the key to eternal youth (or a younger man, or surgery and drugs) and I want to be one of those creepily active and healthy grannies when the time rolls around (not too long now).
But all old people will tell you that it is not only the body that begins to fail in old age, but the mind as well. Granted I have never really had a particularly strong or in shape body, so I have always just relied on the fact that I have a relatively sharp mind to make me feel good about myself. But now as I approach old age, NO SUCH LUCK BUDDY! Although the days of memorisation is schools is all but gone, a first year subject this year that FORCES memorisation as the primary learning activity has thrown into sharp realisation that my ticker isn't as quick as it used to be. Turns out simple memorisation tasks leave me feeling dumb as a doorknob and that the ease with which my intellect once worked is all but a thing of the past.
So now with my brain and body gone, I have two options, shall I grow old gracefully and accept that I am no longer 18 anymore? Or shall I buy every cream on the market, drugs, supplements, younger man, healthy lifestyle, never drink again and fight this motherfucker and restore my vitality to its previous self. At least now being old means that I am wise and have experience and many stories to tell, not to mention a load of knowledge bombs to drop on the young and impressionable youth of today who ARE still able to drink until 5am and do an exam that same day. Growing old is a part of life, so what if I am a 21 year old granny, I can still fight it until I am the weird old lady who still parties hard with kids, why not!
As for the wrinkles... DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED!!!
It seems that after years of moderate - heavy (student/backpacker) paced drinking, the ole cuerpo seems to be having a much harder time in the morning after. Not only that, the entire day after, that night and several days afterwards seem to be very slow moving after a big night out. Not only that, it seems that once I hit a certain alcohol threshold, rather than partying on, doing silly things and talking shit all night, I just go home. Whether that happens at 3am, 1am or even midnight, that young person stamina just isn't there anymore. It is not uncommon for me in my old age now to fall asleep IN THE MIDDLE of a party, be it in a chair, on a couch, on the floor or right next to the speaker, it seems my body has gotten the better of me. For that reason, I decided to test out the ole non drinking routine to see if it might just the the dirty Mexican licor de agave, however, the only difference these days is that I can stay out dancing for longer and I generally manage to WALK home rather than passing out wherever I am. The next day still feels like I have been hit by a truck and the getting out of bed process is still slow, painful and often resigned to a long sleep in at the best of times. But will this stop me partying? Hell no! I am still young enough to want to party! My body just isn't anymore.
But it's not only the partying stamina that has dropped, but the fitness as well. So even in spite of doing yoga a few times a week, it seems all I feel like doing afterwards is eating a big fuck off steak and some chocolate and lying down for a few hours, rather than running a marathon, going for a bike ride or doing anything active. Also, certain poses leave me feeling achy and slow for a day or 2 afterwards, after a STRETCHING WORKOUT!! As for real exercise, well after a bit of rock climbing the other day I was in pain for 2 days afterwards when I tried to lift my arms above my head! And as for climbing a mountain, one leg is STILL hurting 4 days later (how I walk so that only one leg hurts is any one's question). I think that is a pretty big body fitness fail if I ever did see one. But I keep persisting, because many chronologically old people tell me that exercise is the key to eternal youth (or a younger man, or surgery and drugs) and I want to be one of those creepily active and healthy grannies when the time rolls around (not too long now).
But all old people will tell you that it is not only the body that begins to fail in old age, but the mind as well. Granted I have never really had a particularly strong or in shape body, so I have always just relied on the fact that I have a relatively sharp mind to make me feel good about myself. But now as I approach old age, NO SUCH LUCK BUDDY! Although the days of memorisation is schools is all but gone, a first year subject this year that FORCES memorisation as the primary learning activity has thrown into sharp realisation that my ticker isn't as quick as it used to be. Turns out simple memorisation tasks leave me feeling dumb as a doorknob and that the ease with which my intellect once worked is all but a thing of the past.
So now with my brain and body gone, I have two options, shall I grow old gracefully and accept that I am no longer 18 anymore? Or shall I buy every cream on the market, drugs, supplements, younger man, healthy lifestyle, never drink again and fight this motherfucker and restore my vitality to its previous self. At least now being old means that I am wise and have experience and many stories to tell, not to mention a load of knowledge bombs to drop on the young and impressionable youth of today who ARE still able to drink until 5am and do an exam that same day. Growing old is a part of life, so what if I am a 21 year old granny, I can still fight it until I am the weird old lady who still parties hard with kids, why not!
As for the wrinkles... DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED!!!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Fiesta fiesta fiesta!! Phew...
Amongst many, there are two universal generalities that must be acknowledged. One is that University exchange students party a lot (a shitload even?)! Another is that all Mexicans, be them old, young, short, tall, hot or ugly also enjoy a party... a big party in fact... at least once a year. And if you consider an exchange student in Mexico, you have a sure fire recipe for a pissed off liver, not enough sleep and barely mediocre grades. Let me elaborate:
In Mexico, social life is extremely important and it seems there is nothing people like more than getting together with lots of food, alcohol and family friends to be jolly and merry. Another very important aspect is religion, which explains why most communities, cities, pueblos and localities have a giant church and a patron saint. Patron saints (although they mean eff all to atheists such as myself) are highly revered by the pueblo they represent and deserve a day of worship (or provide an excuse for a big party if you may). Over the past 2 weekends, I have been lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time to take part in 2 holy days/fiestas in 2 different places, and boy can these Mexicans party. Dancing in the streets, indigenous groups from surrounding areas showcasing their dancing prowess and amazing costumes, food stalls and more elotes and cotton candy than you can poke a stick at, masses partying in the streets, beer left right and centre and so much more... nothing says "OH PRAISE THEE HOLY SAINT!" like a party. It is inspiring to see an entire community (and in the case of San Miguel de Allende... almost an entire state!) come together to share in a joie de vivre that Mexicans just exude unlike anyone else. And unlike belligerent, drunken idiot Australians who would most likely be covered in vomit, beating eachother in the street and behaving like animals in the presence of free flowing alcohol in the streets, Mexicans just seem to be able to enjoy themselves with only a few drunken sleazy louts to annoy and molest (granted we don't see what happens when they get home).
Another fabulous feature of Mexican fiestas to worship patron saints is the fireworks spectacular. After seeing the man burn at Burning Man, I thought all fireworks from that point on would be a huge disappointment. As usual, I was wrong. Even in the smallest of pueblos, the fireworks towers that are created are mindblowing and astonishing. While the safety standards of such shows are dubious (non existent), the sheer size and creativity of such shows just blow ones mind. Clear goggles and a safe distance (although not guaranteed) are a few simple rules of the fireworks show and avoid polyester, flamable clothing because you WILL get showered in embers and ash.
BUT it's not only the Mexicans who like to get their drink on and have a good time de vez en cuando, but also University exchange students. Although most students in general are big partiers no matter where they are, it seems being on exchange, having easy classes (well at least in Mexico) and not having to worry about grades just adds fuel to the already young, invincible, hormone fueled students who roam the streets. It seems that no matter what night of the week (maybe not Monday) there is some kind of party, bar hop, drinking promotion or just plain catch up going on that one rarely needs to spend a night at home if they don't wish. Last week alone I think I was only in for 1 or 2 nights, which inevitably results in sore, tired bodies and heads the following day. Add to that, the fact that September and October seem to be birthday season and that drinks are incredibly cheap in Mexico (1L of licor de agave goes for about $2.50 AUD), Mexico for exchange students is a party and a half.
Which of course is why I had to give up drinking (and of course the personal challenge/loss of my favourite drinking buddy/not be an alcoholic) for a few weeks. Seems now I can dance all night like a lunatic, not humiliate myself, remember most of the people I meet the following day and act all smug when I wake up the next morning fresh as a spring daisy. Although anyone who knows me (myself included) knows that this is definitely not forever... in fact the date October 28th is looming in my mind as we speak... Licor de agave anyone?
In Mexico, social life is extremely important and it seems there is nothing people like more than getting together with lots of food, alcohol and family friends to be jolly and merry. Another very important aspect is religion, which explains why most communities, cities, pueblos and localities have a giant church and a patron saint. Patron saints (although they mean eff all to atheists such as myself) are highly revered by the pueblo they represent and deserve a day of worship (or provide an excuse for a big party if you may). Over the past 2 weekends, I have been lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time to take part in 2 holy days/fiestas in 2 different places, and boy can these Mexicans party. Dancing in the streets, indigenous groups from surrounding areas showcasing their dancing prowess and amazing costumes, food stalls and more elotes and cotton candy than you can poke a stick at, masses partying in the streets, beer left right and centre and so much more... nothing says "OH PRAISE THEE HOLY SAINT!" like a party. It is inspiring to see an entire community (and in the case of San Miguel de Allende... almost an entire state!) come together to share in a joie de vivre that Mexicans just exude unlike anyone else. And unlike belligerent, drunken idiot Australians who would most likely be covered in vomit, beating eachother in the street and behaving like animals in the presence of free flowing alcohol in the streets, Mexicans just seem to be able to enjoy themselves with only a few drunken sleazy louts to annoy and molest (granted we don't see what happens when they get home).
Another fabulous feature of Mexican fiestas to worship patron saints is the fireworks spectacular. After seeing the man burn at Burning Man, I thought all fireworks from that point on would be a huge disappointment. As usual, I was wrong. Even in the smallest of pueblos, the fireworks towers that are created are mindblowing and astonishing. While the safety standards of such shows are dubious (non existent), the sheer size and creativity of such shows just blow ones mind. Clear goggles and a safe distance (although not guaranteed) are a few simple rules of the fireworks show and avoid polyester, flamable clothing because you WILL get showered in embers and ash.
BUT it's not only the Mexicans who like to get their drink on and have a good time de vez en cuando, but also University exchange students. Although most students in general are big partiers no matter where they are, it seems being on exchange, having easy classes (well at least in Mexico) and not having to worry about grades just adds fuel to the already young, invincible, hormone fueled students who roam the streets. It seems that no matter what night of the week (maybe not Monday) there is some kind of party, bar hop, drinking promotion or just plain catch up going on that one rarely needs to spend a night at home if they don't wish. Last week alone I think I was only in for 1 or 2 nights, which inevitably results in sore, tired bodies and heads the following day. Add to that, the fact that September and October seem to be birthday season and that drinks are incredibly cheap in Mexico (1L of licor de agave goes for about $2.50 AUD), Mexico for exchange students is a party and a half.
Which of course is why I had to give up drinking (and of course the personal challenge/loss of my favourite drinking buddy/not be an alcoholic) for a few weeks. Seems now I can dance all night like a lunatic, not humiliate myself, remember most of the people I meet the following day and act all smug when I wake up the next morning fresh as a spring daisy. Although anyone who knows me (myself included) knows that this is definitely not forever... in fact the date October 28th is looming in my mind as we speak... Licor de agave anyone?
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